itsjoysworld.net

Normally I avoid conflict like the plague. I don’t really feel like my opinion matters. I’m just me. Confidence has always been an issue for me, and it is something I don’t see changing anytime soon.
A certain person’s comments has pulled me out of my non-conflict blanket fort. He wrote a statement basically telling a woman to, “To go eat their last Dairy
ueen Blizzard and then hang yourself in the closet.” He claims he doesn’t stand for any type of bullying. Yeah…..
This man states he is a personal trainer wanting to assist people in becoming more healthy. How is telling someone this healthy?
I was hoping he was just writing in the heat of the moment. I am not in anyway standing up for his statement, but most people are guilty of saying something they are not proud of when they are immersed in emotions. The sad thing is he seems to still be in this haze of anger and more awful things keeps spewing out of his fingers and onto his social media sites.

So I left this post for a couple of days. I wasn’t even sure I would come back to it. My body image has been the worst it has been in years. Harper Sloan has a challenge out today. The #perfectlyimperfect challenge post a selfie without wearing any make-up. And I can’t do it. I can’t even post a picture if me wearing make-up.
As an author I realize how powerful words are. They can knock the breath out of you. I try to remember (contradiction coming) words actually do not have power unless you give it the power to knock you over. You can disregard any words you here.
You. Do. Not. Have. To. Give. Them. Power.
I have said this many times, and I can’t seem to allow it to penetrate my brain. I allowed words and actions to take what little confidence I had away. I will believe a you’re funny compliment. I will not take a you are beautiful compliment. Honestly I feel like that person is a liar.
In my stand up class there was a girl who oozed confidence. She was incredible and I couldn’t understand how she was so comfortable being her. The funny thing was she couldn’t understand how I couldn’t stand being me.
I joke and tell people I have sidewalk written across my forehead. I will not stick up for myself. If someone does me wrong I will justify it in my head. Making them more important than my feelings.
I will say I get hurt when I’m taken advantage of. Even if it’s something as minute as being cut off in line. I feel that person is validating my thoughts that I am less important.
When I get ready in the morning I refuse to look in the mirror longer than it takes to make sure everything is in place. The mirror gets my middle finger more times than I would like to admit. Four years ago I lost 70lbs. The sad truth is I still didn’t feel comfortable in my skin. I still hated what I saw.
So for anyone to tell someone that they are not worthy of living the life they are living is disgusting to me. It shows they actually feel they feel they are more important than the other person.
I wish we could treat people with respect. Because most of us are fighting our own internal battle. We don’t need outside sources to influence our feelings in a negative way. Because from experience even if you lose weight you can still be just as unhappy as you were when you were carrying those extra pounds.
Think of others around you and try to be kind. They are most likely struggling. Telling someone what to do to make them feel better might not be what they need, so just be nice
Don’t be like me.
Feel important because you are important.
Make changes to better yourself, but love yourself as you are in this moment.
This post is going to have a ton of typos. If I re-read it I will not post this, and I’ve already been holding onto it long enough.